Talking to Myself

I'm looking back on the days that have passed
On days when I used to feel relief
When I had people to talk to
To turn to in times of need
At the end of each day when the burden would lift
Leaving me at peace with a strange satisfaction
Now I hold it all inside until the day i release
I use many things as a mask
And many masks I do wear
I drown my sorrow in alcohol
Bury my pain with sarcasm
And the hole I have dug
I am thought of only as an asshole
With the things I do for people
I thought I deserved more
Just one more mistake I placed before me
The past was where it was clear
I had my friends to turn to
Now its darkness I see
I dont see the worth of speaking
When I no one understand the truth
Those near me I have pushed away
I find no reason to try
Soon I will surely lose control
And will lose everything
Its better for me to keep things inside
Cut the ties that bring people too close to me
Because no one wants to hear what I have to say