Only Time Can Tell

Hope is not gone, its just beginning to rise

Wipe the memories from the window but not from my mind

With each new day my heart grows stronger

Never knowing what you have til its gone

All around me my eyes see things of the past

Writing on the window to objects in my room

Picking up the pieces of all we've gone through

I think, I pray, I hope, I know

You'll see what we had and know there's something

The pain of hearing you never felt the spark

With your last you did, that really broke my heart

Did everything I could for fear of losing you

But I'm no Ben Franklin, got no lightning with that key

On the day that you realize that we had something

I promise, I am still going to be here

Not keeping hold of my breath

But knowing that your heart can see

Much more than you realize I would always be there

Want to hold you when you need

To laugh when we're happy

Was never one for giving up, I'm not about to start

I will be here in the end, when you truly look into your heart

A Spark

If there, could ignite

Tried my hardest, put up a fight

You were everything

My heart, and soul

At the drop of a hat would have fought for you

But I couldn't give you the spark you needed

If one wish could be granted

It would be this

That you could have felt the spark

Instead of the end that is.

Love is a strong feeling, but if it is unrequited then where does it lead?

Guarding Love

Let my arms do their best

To guard you

hold you close

Sat what words cannot

Let you know I'd never harm you

That I would put it all on the line

I would gaze into your eyes

And would have to say no words

You would know I really care

That I would never do no wrong

I may make mistakes

Don't claim to be perfect

But hurting you ain't my style

I could be a lover, not a fighter

Your knight in shining armor

I'd be first to throw that punch

If someone tries to mess with you

This is corny as hell

But its the best I got

Questionable Feeling

You make me feel insignificant compared to those around us

My words mean more than you'll ever know

My words mean nothing compared to those around us

I feel as if my place is undefined

Did I make the right choice?

Would you ever actually choose me?

Could I prove you wrong and make you fall in love?

I fear that which is unknown to me

Do my thoughts overpower the truth?

Could there ever be more than what is?

You gave me hope and then let me fall alone.

Heart Like a Switch

Flipped like a switch

From released to stressed

Feel the beats in my heart compressed

I lose my nerve

Can't follow the curve

To keep the path

I feel the internal wrath

From my brain

the Pain

The thump things, coming from the dazed

I just feel so crazed

I can't sleep

Like a cut soo deep

Feel the stings

Left from the torture it brings

How one moment find serenity

And the next cry insanity

The thoughts are gone

Where did I go wrong

Today the joy I feel is love

Coming from my darling dove

Can't explain all this pent up rage

Like a wile animal stuck in a cage

And with a simple pen

Could the switch be flipped in reverse

Feel like a curse

This anger won't let go

It just keeps a constant flow

Has a grasp on me

Will I ever be free

From the chains

Let loose from the pains

Able only for a short escape

Its a complete rape

Of all control I've lost it all

Nowhere left to fall

But in the end she keeps me sane

The one thing I have to gain

Calms me down

Never lets me wear a frown

With just one look

Can read me like an open book

The Heart Does Not Reason

My heart's a mess

Full of distress

The feeling, unlike before

I thought you were my biggest score

Made me complete

To no avail

Because you didn't feel the same

You gave me strength

I overcame my flaws

All for you

The love I had was true

Played the game and lost

But I will always be there

Will never go away

You mean more to me than you know

Never wanted to let you go

But its over

You ended it

Still want you to be happy

But you couldn't feel the spark

When you see the mistake you made

Here I will be

Not waiting but hoping that you will see

That the two of us were meant to be

My Verbal Contract

When I see you

Your eyes

They compromise

The Way I see the world

Its alive

Never knowing where I was going

never knowing what i was doing

But when I hold you

Time stops moving

I feel your trance

Heart beats faster

Gotta catch my breath

Need to take a rest

Cause my minds long gone

Feel it with my soul

Ya know I feel it with my soul

Its like a static shock

A spark ignites

Lights up the night

One touch of your lips

Knew things could be right

Said I was the one that saved you

As true as it may be

Baby, you the one that saved me

You saved me

Cause me as I was falling

Down to the depths

Brought me back to life

I'm the one that owes you

Stopping the stress

The mess that I was about to become

Close to giving up

Gave me a second chance

Don't know about a romance

Too soon to tell

But I breath easily

Knowing you can see me

For what I really am

Not just how i appear

Or the rumors that you hear

What was, is, will be

The future I can't see

The present looks soo clear

Taking away my fears

Calm my nerved

Wish I could repay

But I'm the one's gonna be payin

For the moments that you gave me

Whether we let them linger

Or me start a fresh

Second guess

Up to you

You know that I'll follow through

With any plans we make

I'll never break

My word, my verbal contract

Signing on the dotted line

Ain't no loophole I can find

Cause I couldn't tell a lie

I'm no private eye

Just a policy of mine

This probably won't make sense

And thats cause I'm no Eminem

No Slim Shady

Ain't got no flow

Just a white kid tryna rap, yo

Foolish Am I

Feeling like I'm jumping through hoops

Never knowing where I stand with you

Putting myself into these pains

Trying to figure out what is going on

Confused of why I do this to myself

You make me feel things I've never felt before

I know what I said could never be taken back

That my feelings may not be returned

We don't have a relationship

That you are happy just where we are

No idea where we are going

Trying to get a moment

Even a second is like trying to invade Fort Knox

It just isn't in the cards

Its paining me when you just almost look right through me

Friends first and yet you barely let me be that

Just because I have feelings for you

Now I am just a face, a fly on the wall

Going nowhere and getting there fast

My stomach is turning trying to make sense

Losing my mind because regardless of how foolish I feel

The moments we do spend together make me feel amazing

To me a second of talking, one smile, one glance brightens my day

In a moment it feels like you'd give me away

Sometimes it feels like I'm digging a grave

Nonetheless you amazing me

The way I can be soo open

You never make me shy to talk

I can tell you everything

And maybe that was my downfall

I would take back what i said

You wanted open and I opened myself

I wont hide what I feel

Because at the end of the day

I'm still thinking about you

How your touch and embrace makes things better

The way you entrance me with a single stare

But in those moments when I have doubt

I feel like a train just ran me over

You make me wonder if there is anything more than the eye detects

And time and again you remind me where we are

I don't want to lose what we have

But when it seems like you'd drop me quick

It seems like I could leave a room unnoticed

Though when you're gone I wish you weren't

I never thought myself to be one to land a girl like you

And still inside I know I didn't actually land you

Its a temporary moment that seems to linger

Time stands still but will go on

And then where will we be?

Prize at the Finish Line

This fight is still beginning

The finish line is no where in sight

The starting gun has just gone off

And have only run so far

I have never quit before

Now is not the time for firsts

Only first place

You're elusive

One second here, the next moment gone

Not sure if the prize is even there

But from here the prize is worth the fight

I can't let go

Not until I know

If I can reach the goal

That I long to exist

Then you can see who I am

Til then I run

I chase, and I fight

Obstacles creating momentary drag

My thoughts, feelings and mind racing against me

Here is to the hope

The hope that there is still a prize at the end of the race

Racetrack Thoughts

Doin some quick thinking

My mind goin round a race track

Same thoughts coming over and over again

Not sure where the end will be

I just seem to find the same results

Never first but never last

Becoming someone that I wish I wasnt

Wishing I was someone else

Drawing upon other qualities tearing me apart

Having no idea where I should go

What I should say

I am talking to myself

In a conversation with two sides

Going against myself

And getting nowhere fast.

Me

I am on person but I have different parts

I have the athleticism, the brains, the sensitivity and the laughter

Before you can understand me

You must know what makes me

Without even one of these bases

You don't have the full me

It's like having a bat without a ball

The bat is the bat

But what to do

When all the bases come together

You have the full 100% me

Different-Same

Different people

Different places

Different worlds

Different lives

Different choices

Different roads taken

In some way we are different

In some we are the same

We are all people

We all have worlds and lives

We all have choices to make

Roads to take

We can all be whatever we want to be

We may be different people

Different careers

We all must make life choices

Choose between the roads that come to us

End.

There I was staring into what I thought to be the end.

I had never noticed, but it had been there before.

I don't really know what it was, but I don't think I will ever know truly.

It was dark and I couldn't see.

The end to an earlier part of my life.

It was gone.

Gone forever

Life as I View it

Sparks of Life as numerous as the stars

The telescope I view through

Brings me closest to the the start

The beginning and the end

Fire burning from the spark

From dust we came and shall return

Life after death, like the phoenix doth burn

Fate left to the heart

letting nothing rip apart

Dreams as vast as the sky

leaving the past where it lies

Nothing holding you back

Grasping your future in a swift attack

Power of your heart being your guiding light

If something stops then put up a fight

Pen to paper, the ink showing your feelings

Listen to the music, sounds like bells are pealing

Cool air blowing through your hair

Clearing your head or aggravations

Your mind left guilty by association

Sometimes the thymes come easy, other times its tough

But writing calms the nerves, when the going gets touch

Burning through ink like a hummer on gas

taking advantage, letting no opportunity pass

Girls will come and go, and friends will chill and argue

Summers with the family, plans of barbecues

The poems make sense and sometimes they don't

But writing leaves your feelings on the outside like an overcoat

Picking friends carefully is a wise decision

Choosing those you can trust, thinking with strong precision

Important decisions in life require careful thinking

The most important may need some drinking

Life can be hectic but I try to keep cool headed

I try to remember in my life never to let myself be threatened

Staying on the up and up

Always looking at the cup

Never half empty but half full

Keeping my life entertaining never dull

The theater is my life

Backstabbing knife

Chopping veggies by day

Reciting lines by night

Chef whites by choice

Theater masks by fate

Gonna be actin til I reach the pearly gates

Girls are my weakness and I got no game

But in my eyes that aint no shame

I live for the lime light

Dream about the spotlight

Waiting for the big break

For one change I'm willing to take

To perform for the masses

See the world through rose colored glasses

No shades of gray

No shadows of the day

I believe my life is a musical

Full of ups and downs

But will end up with a happy ending

A crowd without a frown

Everyday has its own song

No lyrics written wrong

I'm a writer and an actor

Personality's a major factor

To how I will succeed

Now to figure how to proceed

Someday down the line

I'll finally have the time

To settle down with a beauty

To whom I'll give my love truly

Be where I belong

Always keeping strong

Having all my dreams come true

Becoming a bit delirious

Looking at things serious

As I've grown older I have changed

I created myself anew

Always being who I've been

Exactly who I knew

Setting The Stage of Life

The stage

The lights, the set, the curtain

Objects become people

Extensions of the actors body

The actor becoming part of the set

The curtain being the start of life

It opens as we begin the journey

Closes when we part the world

Throughout our lives

Actors we shall play

Performing who we are

We showcase comedies, tragedies

Dramas and romances

In each our lives

The lead it is we play

There are supporting roles

Coming and going from the stage

No character static

Each in their time shall change

Playing a variety of characters

The antagonist, protagonist

Hero and villain

The lover, the clown

The parent and child

Lights always shining on us

At times much brighter

And others seem dark

At the end of the show

Resolution of the plot

The lights fade out

The curtain closes

For one final applause

The standing ovation

The stage is blank

Ready for a new show to begin

Life Can Be A Real Bridge

Life is a bridge

Each path we take

Every lesson we learn

Is another board added

Our family is the base

Holding it all together

Some families are broken

Leaving parts of the rope frayed

Friends are the ties

Keeping us steady

And the boards in place

When we find a gap in our lives

That is a step no longer there

We find a fill for the gap

Keeping the bridge a whole

When at least out time has come

The bridge complete

Creating our way of crossing

Life is like a bridge

Creating who we are

Have known love but once

Some people wish for more wealth

Some wish for longer life

While others for health

Me, I just wish for love

In my life I have befriended fear

Fallen in and out with pain

But have known love but once

She sent me in spirals and circles

Blasted me into outer space

Taught me to love

Even through pain

I've been lied to, cheated

My heart has been beaten

But have known love but once

I've felt the warmth of another body

Pressed against in a kiss

Been in a relationship

But couldn't commit

Looked deeply into eyes

And felt nothing

But have known love but once

Had control of my facade

As well as my drinking

I lost the control

And this is what you see

The drinking has ceased

The shield had been lowered

But have known love but once

I am able to see the beauty

In things that people pass

I look at a flower

But see much more than that

My writing, my friends, the stage

There in lies a feeling I know not

A smile, so simple

It spreads across my face

No shield, no guard

Completely exposed

I leave myself bear

For the whole world to know

Faith will be my guardian

For but once have I felt love